I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
where are you?
Hypothermia
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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