I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
