so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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