guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
