I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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