So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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