it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
