She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Randomize
