Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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