So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
