I smell stomach acid.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize