Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize