i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
