apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
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