im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Nicole vs. Life
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
