Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
