once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
