why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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