sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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