is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Randomize
