We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
FUCK WHALES
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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