i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
