Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Randomize
