Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
