Your mouth is God's brothel.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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