Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
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