i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
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