But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
