Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
