I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
