Nicole vs. Life
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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