I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
