i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize