So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Randomize
