I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
she peed on how many people?
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Randomize
