Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
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