I wanna bring you to show and tell
i think i have herpe
just one?
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
