"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
