im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Randomize