is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
