Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize