i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Randomize
