I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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