We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
