Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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