can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Randomize
