North Korea, Best Korea!
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
