I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
