i jhust puked up my retainher.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
