We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Randomize
